Goals

Reverb14 is a prompt-a-day series for the month of December designed to reflect on 2014 and project hopes and dreams for 2015.  Throughout December,SarahKat and I will post each day with a new prompt.  Join us by writing, or join us by reading.   Follow us on Twitter @project_reverb and #reverb14.

Goals | What’s on tap for next year?  Share your big (or small) goals with us.  Why did you pick those goals?  Are these things you’ve always wanted to do?  How are you going to get them done?

Fifteen Goals for 2015

1) Write more letters. I write an a lot of letters as it is, but the quality of this exercise has tapered over the last year. I want to write letters that make people feel loved.

2) Spend more time with Roo. I could spend every waking hour with my beast and even then that would not be enough.

3) See more theatre.  I randomly began seeing more theatre in 2014 and found I enjoyed it, so I’d like to make it a habit.

4) Participate in more quality-of-life activity. By virtue of a lot of Things Beyond My Control, I wind up participating in a lot of Tick The Box activities — a lot of need to have, or nice to have done kind of stuff. I would like to focus on things that are at least marginally more meaningful than that in the days ahead.

5) Give more space for trauma.  My friend Jean posted this article from the Washington Post about how What Doesn’t Kill You Doesn’t Necessarily Make You StrongerWhile I’ve been through a lot of sometimes challenging experiences in my life, and many of the things I’ve experienced have given me the opportunity to cultivate resiliency, I have to admit that I have been beating myself up for a long time over why I have still struggled so mightily with some things and never Got Over Them. It never occurred to me that when you suffer a series of unexpected and serious traumas — it’s Okay not to bounce back quickly, or easily. I’m just going to give myself more space on this one.

6) Seek out more support.

7) Learn to properly use Excel. This sounds like an unbearably lame resolution, but as a lawyer whose career began just before the advent of technology in the profession — i.e., when I was in school, Westlaw and Lexis were not considered “valid” citators, and most states still published their cases in books — having more than a really baseline knowledge of most software was considered superfluous. I’m not that old, but in the time between when I went to school and now, the world changed A LOT and really fast.

8) Be more open to change. A lot will be changing over this year. I can either dig my heels in, or embrace it.

9) Listen more. I’m more of a do-er. I feel overwhelmed by choices, so I tend to limit myself to considering a handful of possibilities once I figure out what universe I’m dealing with, then I make decisions quickly and I don’t look back. I have no patience for indecisive people. In fact, I tend to make quick, decisive, personal judgments about indecisive people (!!!). Even though I’ve always made decisions this way, I’m not sure it’s the “right” way. Maybe I could benefit from taking in a little bit more information.

10) Get back out there. I had two major surgeries last year. I’ve begun running again, but I just need to get my butt back out there and run a damned race. I know I’ll feel a WHOLE lot better when I do — even if it’s a slow, slow time. I just need to plug my ears, and ignore all the medals, and PRs, and negative splits on Facebook and Instagram and Be Where I Am and embrace it.

11) Experience my first PR in years. I’ve been taken apart and put back together. The rehab has been time consuming. Is it so much to ask to be able to get back out there and be just marginally faster?! I’m not asking for a miracle here. I’m just asking to shave a second or two off (once I start racing again)!

12) Save more money. Ugh. Paul and I decided to do some of the most expensive stuff in the universe all at once. So much for paying off my law school loans this year.

13) Scotch-guard the rugs. This is actually more of a to-do list item, but I’m running out of steam.

14) Buy winter boots. I have lived in the NY-DC area for nearly 13 years, and have never bothered to buy snow boots. I’ve survived multiple major blizzards by simply being out of town for them. I don’t know if it’s laziness, or denial, or … what that has prevented me from buying a proper pair of Sorels.

15) Make more space for me. I am a small woman, and sometimes I feel like I make myself physically smaller than I am to accommodate others. I give in; I curl up; I fade. Sure, I have a loud voice, and I’m not a…wallflower. But I give into things that I never, ever intended to give into simply because I’m sick of fighting; I’m scared to be the tall poppy; I’m afraid to be the woman whose head gets chopped off.

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